Sliding Deck Door Weatherproof

I know more garnix

alcohol has been done to me almost always useful. I hope he does today.
(in this sense, cheers - I just hope my stomach has already been recovered.)

I'm not cool man (more). I am now no intelligent person (more?). I wonder more and more often if I'm still a human being.
I really have no absolute know more of what makes a man really. Whether it is the pursuit of spiritual enlightenment now, the attempt "to achieve something in life" or "sacrifice" for his fellow man - in my life I think of nothing more of it
intellectuals (Kiffer. included), BWLer and believers would say exceptionally unanimously that therein lies my problem. Presumably, people need a goal to live to effectively to. Since then, all I wanted to finish it (and did not do it only from a well-known reason) I do not have any one target. Sure, I habeunzählige targets small "kill anyone" "Just get out of Bayern," "just to get away from Germany", "... not even myself", etc. .. But a real life goal I can not find it easy.
And obviously I am also apparently unable to supposedly simplest human behaviors ... . Imitate The fact that my automatic, intuitive patterns not succeed, I have known for years and I can not change it. (In principle, I fear that I even "too stupid to shit" bin in the frequency with which I in recent years to anal bleeding tendency.) Trying to mimic human behavior suggests, unfortunately, fail. I suspect this is because I do not understand and can recognize the fact no difference to my actions. How does something like this is extremely difficult to describe. An attempt
: As an office clerk, I learned to write formal letters, job applications, etc. Self-praise, but I would say that I am quite good at it or at least was. Interestingly, I'm probably not able to write a human-standard mail to my boss, which is reflected in phrases such as "write something like this not be" expressed. If I become abusive, I would have understood a phrase (and my boss probably my e-mail). I hold nothing but pure fact unvormell or to be "false-bürokaufmännisch" when it comes to the boss you had better get searching for a different employee if he is not satisfied with my work. Where is the problem, very open and relaxed ? (! But factual) to talk about a possible dismissal, if not give me the power of my desk lamp is sufficient, I can say quite easily: "I throw away the old and buy myself a new" ;. With so hypocritical posturing as a human work force is more than an interchangeable object, I need at the present time to get any, we know ALL how it is actually
Well.. As far as the example.
What makes me really charged, is the fact that I unimpressive in my (panic) quest to be conspicuous and obviously nothing in the world failed altogether had the office I am
colleagues who "smell" after a working day (sometimes even at the start) start;. let the time come after work the pen; spend your vacations in Mallorca ; look, as they fell from a container used clothing, make the whole day nervous rocking movements or drum; the foot tear on other colleagues, etc.
-itself, I was always proud to be managed to have me out stay out of this whole unpleasant little things. I would also find fault with something like that in others only if It really hinder me in my work would be.
seems that I've done it but maybe not really, not the employees to stand out negatively. ... As a personal conversation with my boss showed today.
First of all: I'm not vindictive, yet I could not swallow for habits "admonished" to be that disturb me in others. I just do not feel like my colleagues (personal) blacken.
My problem is that I can do with the essence of today's call, nothing. I simply do not understand what is meant when it means I should work together "normal (he) Act." Well, I'm easy to accept change and to put my colleagues with the things I say on the nerves go, my cooling body functions, I will from now on no more quickly with a fresh eliminate tempo, but seek for the bathroom that it sucks, when I eat at the place they would have said it before, but ok - can I just be
just above sea level. over three points of criticism I just get a clear picture, what is meant: (? why should "we" not now talking about cancellations)

1. my aforementioned problem with communication
2. by some of my colleagues feel "unnatural Natural movements disturbed. I just do not know what! Certainly are not meant the painful movements I make, since our seats were not designed for 2-meter man. It must go well to subconscious stress reactions. Well what can I say - I try to move as little as possible in the future.
3. My "dress stick" is probably not very popular. ... I usually choose my clothes according to (in this order): Availability (in my size), durability, comfort, inconspicuous, flavor ... Apparently a black, unmarked T-shirt is not normal enough (at least I've ever found out) is. I am very surprised because there are people in the company, with the flip flops, headbands and short shorts show. I have no alternative but to comply with the invitation, but I just do not HOW!

Well, embarrassing Blog Entry, but I'm just before the unsolvable puzzle of my life and have only the urge ... my obligations here just to let them down.

... I just do not anymore. How to be human?

Ps holiday in Denmark was good - I can unfortunately not remember just more to it, how to relax without a PC ... Unfortunately really true, I relax MAY not me

Pps I used to be able to overcome something simple with alcohol (even without being dependent - finally inherited a good feature), now denied me. my stomach "to "Forgotten.

How To Put A Wood Floor In A Boat

snobbery

I think I've discovered the problem with my self-esteem at last.
Actually, I do not feel myself as something better than my fellow man (quite the contrary) - but my fellow
do everything to prove to me (or the world in general) that they are something worse than me!

... there MUST you are so crazy in the head! As I've been the only managed to stay normal!

so I drive to fast times for a week to Denmark.

CU

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washaeckermacht a reply to a comment

interesting. I usually am ever more reluctant to respond to comments on my blog (not to open up discussions - I have even now not before), but now it's become such a long train of thought that I post it as a blog entry. (Looks like crap so in response to a comment) But I reiterate it: I will not discuss!

And now I know who are the smith! * G * I remember surprisingly hard on the young Depeche Mode.
That some people are kinda cold, I've had in school at times noticed a buddy; ... hmmm ... I actually came to (unsexuellem) physical contact with a boy?? ... This comment always raises more questions. But if I go to a fortune teller, I would be interested not so well for my future, but for my past ...

Well. I'm never quite sure if I'm smart or less smart (maybe I am "manic-"???) stupid - I can much" everyday "explained ears not in our society. The result is that I am often criticized for being "stupid" questions to which I to my regret but can not yet answer of course. In this respect, I am interested in Mattresses story actually. Unfortunately, I can understand something at all, because I am a very comfortable man who has no problems EVER, lie down comfortably during sex and to wait. : D
The idea with the "sleep on it" occurred to me. Again * g * I'm also assessed functional rather than emotional (a lot of emotions I find somehow stupid) to me what makes the understanding of such matters further still.
A friend once said, it had something to do with the fact that some men by somehow "powerful" (from "Have power over the woman") feel. If one does but also when one is standing in an ant and you waste threatens draufzutreten to them if they do not make haste from the field. Is at least on my Sun (I do not fly from the air or catch them just can successfully make threatening mad - mosquitoes even more) ... tickets ... is you ever noticed that humans and flies, and could be the same species? Both want to necessarily make her nose stuck somewhere and had the hole no matter how small. But then what they do inside or how they even get out again, about to make no Thoughts.
But I stray from the subject again.
rape, probably as Manager-/BWLer- be a disease, queue jumping, and faster and stronger than others - even if it is the queue in front of the meat grinder. Well: * * bssssss indicated. From my past, I know well what it's like to have a certain "decision-making position", is really very great, but what one of them for people to be arbitrarily "violated"? ... Except times of school shootings and Geoziden, that sense I can understand because of my misanthropy. Really powerful I could not assume . Feel Is perhaps as a matter of conscience. But apart from that I could not understand it, there must also be a more plausible answer as a feeling of power ... right?

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@ 2009-08-13T20: 24:00

For a long time (oh, how "long" but the film is already available on DVD ... haha), I once again "let down" and John Rambo gekuckt. Say what you will, but I think the movie really class. From the Action ago I find it even better than Rambo first And buying the uncut version, in my opinion was worth to it. ... And by the way: he has no Leyen-mutilation. : D

But I still noticed How big is the similarities of Turok and Rambo are.
self has something of the Rambo theme song "Karl-May-sized" in itself. Both like to handle around with bows and arrows but also benefit plattzumähen times like brute weapons to the area.
That reminds me, I have the last part (of this New-school-remake) by Turok gedaddelt still not at all . If I get time.

Currently I am (in addition to my work) that employs 3 Fallout gamble. Initially only load the sample to the entertainment factor (ie cheated), but ungecheatet come. Is basically exactly the same as BoilingPoint (Also very awesome) atomic only in a ruin. Just what I like. The only thing that is annoying is that there are so many enemies that you have already house without assistance. The focus is a little too hard on FPS. At that point, Boiling point is still ne corner ordinary genius.


Well, what's new otherwise?
My job has me extremely exhausted the last few weeks, because my bosses have come up with the idea I might come just this and that tinkering with the company's homepage. Unfortunately, there is this to 90 percent from php, js and HTML Tables in scope and is so confusing that I need every 3 hours, only to find out which at the resort to changing styles or to be created at all authority and what I have to do again. Well, my PHP and JS skills are already more than theoretical.
I've noticed the last few weeks very well why I became a programmer and really not a coder. All these stories make me nervous, stressed, aggressive ... I just leach out.
but had a "conversation" with the boss and it should be back to run a little looser for me (no more PHP). Presumably the stress of the last days (company and home of the trouble with the brats on me and her bass), but still handed to me today to collapse overnight (strong Schädelweh, vomiting, sweating, chills and ... oddly enough ... lower temperature ). I'm still painfully dragged to the doctor, only to discover that the man is as always on vacation when I need it most. To have to find another doctor but then I was ready. ... I feel even now still dizzy and dazed (21:00 clock). Must be fit again tomorrow. Must appeal have ne Saturday shift to create my work. Because on Monday we go to Denmark a week!

My first real vacation for over 10 years! Had initially garkeine Bock on leave (mostly because I will be OFFLINE ... AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH ......* serious panic-like *) but after the past few weeks but then (although I'll be offline ... aaaaaahhh ... * little * panic). Did I also bought an extra book for the holidays: "Bulletproof Web Design" (it comes to browser-safe web site coding). Dreamweaver will not install on Hasis laptop (which I may mitnemen according to recent compromise agreements) and can then build on the beach nice cozy websites.

But one question still concerns me, before I try to go to sleep: Why
be raped women? I am imagining something like the rapist really stressful and painful and not a little grabbing. Well, when violence goes by me anyway, any kind of sexual pleasure. But would not it be easier to take it again to a mattress and clean cut a hole?
It had so many advantages:
A mattress does not resist, does not beat around the can, "him" do not bite off one, Noel and roars around not to rape their own furniture or ; bridge is not a punishment, a mattress makes all docile with, for each rape of a mattress is less a woman raped (the best argument the way for someone who has tried more often to bandeln with women who are sexually disturbed by these or related experience!) , will not cuddle afterwards, you have to meet her Liebesschwühre not bring her an orgasm can be a shit (well, stupid when you stand on it to see the woman come) ... I think I ääähhh differ slightly from the actual question.
So why a struggling unexcited woman and not a willing mattress? You may enlighten me please!


good night so far still